Letters of Recommendation: Who to Ask and How

Recommendation letters are the one part of the application written entirely by someone else, which is exactly why families worry about them. The good news is that a strong letter depends mostly on things a student controls: choosing the right people, asking early, and giving them what they need to write specifically.

Who Writes What

On the Common App, several kinds of recommenders can contribute, and each college decides which it requires:

• The school counselor submits the school report and transcript and, at many colleges, a letter. According to the Common App, counselors "share their perspective using the context of the entire graduating class."
• Teachers "give a firsthand account of your intellectual curiosity and creative thought." Many selective colleges require one or two.
• Other recommenders, such as coaches, employers, or mentors, are accepted by some colleges.
• Parents complete a form only for Early Decision, as part of the Early Decision agreement.

Requirements vary widely. MIT, for example, requires letters from two teachers, recommending one from a math or science teacher and one from a humanities, social science, or language teacher. The University of Miami requires one letter, from a counselor or a teacher. UT Austin and Texas A&M make letters optional, and the University of California doesn't accept them unless a campus specifically asks. Check each college's requirements in the Common App or on its admissions site.

How Much Do Letters Matter?

In NACAC's Fall 2023 survey of four-year colleges, 10.8% rated teacher recommendations of considerable importance and 40.5% of moderate importance; counselor recommendations were rated similarly. At the most selective colleges, where many applicants have similar grades and scores, a specific, enthusiastic letter can help distinguish a student.

Which Teachers to Ask

The best recommender is a teacher who knows your student well as a learner, not necessarily the one who gave the highest grade. Look for teachers who:

• Taught your student recently, usually in 11th grade, and ideally in a core academic subject.
• Saw growth or engagement: a student who asked questions, came for help, took on a hard project, or improved over the year.
• Connect to the student's interests, especially for colleges that ask for letters in particular subjects or for students applying to a specific program.

Pair the letters thoughtfully. Two letters that describe different sides of a student, such as a math teacher and an English teacher, usually do more than two that say the same thing.

When and How to Ask

1. Ask in the spring of junior year, in person if possible. Teachers who write many letters often set limits, and early requests are easier to accept.
2. Follow your school's process. Many schools use their own systems and questionnaires, and some set internal deadlines well before college deadlines.
3. Provide a short, useful summary. A one-page note with the courses taken with that teacher, a project or moment your student remembers, what they learned, and their current college plans. MIT's advice to recommenders is that strong letters are "specific and storied" and "go beyond a student's grades," so give teachers material for stories.
4. Add recommenders in the application in the fall, once the college list is set, and share deadlines, especially early ones.
5. Say thank you, and let recommenders know where your student decides to enroll.

The FERPA Waiver

When students invite recommenders on the Common App, they complete a FERPA release authorization, which asks two things: permission for the high school to release records to colleges, and whether the student waives the right to review recommendations. According to the Common App, "Waiving your rights lets colleges know that you don't plan to read your recommendations. This helps reassure colleges that the letters are candid and truthful." It also notes that some recommenders will write only if the student waives, and once a form or application has been submitted, the FERPA decision can't be changed.

Many families waive. The decision belongs to the student and family, but it's worth understanding what colleges infer from it before choosing.

Extra Letters: Usually Unnecessary

Some colleges accept an additional letter from a coach, employer, or mentor. That can help when the letter adds something genuinely new, such as a research supervisor describing independent work. It rarely helps when it repeats what the teachers said, or comes from a prominent person who doesn't know the student well. MIT notes that "most applicants and most admitted students do not submit any supplemental recommendations." When in doubt, follow each college's guidance and send fewer, better letters.

What Parents Should and Shouldn't Do

• Do help your student think about who knows them best, and remind them of deadlines.
• Do encourage a thank-you note.
• Don't contact teachers to ask for letters or suggest what to write. The request should come from the student.
• Don't arrange letters from family friends or public figures who don't know your student's work.

Final Thought

Recommendation letters reward students who have engaged genuinely in class: who participated, asked questions, and let teachers see how they think. That work happens long before anyone asks for a letter, which is why the best preparation for strong recommendations is simply being a curious, involved student in 10th and 11th grade.

For the full picture of the application, see our guide to the college application process and our guide to the application platforms. Our 11th grade college planning helps students plan recommendations alongside testing and the college list.